The World According To Trixie Franklin
by charliespike18
Summary: 'It was a postcard and the reason it had captured my thoughts was because the picture looked just like the beach I used to play on as a small child, with him. Then I realized it probably was the same beach. I hadn't thought about it, or him, in long time, such a long time' - Everything was going so well for Trixie, but they say the worst always comes when you least expect it.
1. Chapter 1

The last flicker of light faded from the sky as I, Trixie Franklin arrived Nonnatus house for the 3rd time that day. I had just delivered Shirley Redmond's second baby, this time it was a little boy, thankfully there had been no complications. Jenny was leaving when I entered the kitchen. Betty Farmer had just gone into labour - 3 months early - and Doctor Turner had been called. Jenny and Sister Bernadette had gone to assist.

I was alone for the first time that day. I wasn't sure if that was good or not, it was in these rare moments on a busy day that I actually had time to think. Unlike usual my thoughts did not turn to how Shirley Redmond's little boy was doing, or whether Mrs Edgware would give birth on her due date or not. Actually the thought that I was currently entertaining was probably as far from midwifery as you could get.

The item that was presently taking over my thoughts was a postcard that sat on the table. It portrayed beach, the waves rolling onto the shore, the sun shining down on the picturesque scene. The reason it had captured my thoughts was because it looked just like the beach I used to play on as a small child. Then I realised it probably was the same beach. I walked over and tentatively picked up the card turning it round in my pale hands.

"Eating cake are we, Nurse Franklin?" Sister Evangelina boomed, startling me from my day dream. I dropped the postcard like it was hot coals. Sister Monica-Joan was right about her, her voice _was_ vaguely reminiscent of a foghorn. I spun around.

"Oh, no cake then," Sister Evangelina muttered, sounding disappointed.

"There is some in the pan over there," I said gesturing at the stove. "It's Victoria sponge," I added as Sister Evangelina started to cut herself a slice of cake and the telephone began to ring. I departed the room and picked up the telephone.

"Nonnatus House Midwife speaking."

….

Later that night I was sitting on Cynthia's bed drinking gin, playing monopoly and smoking, when my thoughts drifted back to the postcard. Jenny was on call so she was in her uniform, whereas I and Cynthia weren't. Jenny was currently purchasing Bond Street and Cynthia was in jail. I hadn't thought about that beach for such a long time, such a very long time…. "Trixie, it's your go," Jenny laughed, handing me the dice. I rolled, and got double 3; I moved the iron 6 spaces and landed on Mayfair.

"Damn, how much is that?" I inquired, turning to face Cynthia, and taking another drag on my cigarette.

"Umm," She paused. "£2,000,"Cynthia continued. I turned to the fake money and started counting all the pieces of paper. I had £500, two £50's and three £100's, most defiantly not enough to afford the rent.

"Wait," Jenny interjected. "Cynthia you're in jail, you can't collect rent!" She shouted, as there was a knock on the door.

"Hide the gin!" I whispered urgently, placing it carelessly in a draw. Cynthia stood and walked the few paces to the door, as these weren't really big rooms.

"There's a young man at the door….." Sister Bernadette's sing-song voice wafted in the room.

"It's probably Jimmy" I interrupted, eyeing Jenny suspiciously and taking another drag on my cigarette.

"No, actually Nurse Franklin, they were asking for you," I nodded, and followed Sister Bernadette to the entrance hall - fully aware that Cynthia and Jenny were right behind me.

He was standing just in front of the red wooden door in full Navy uniform, even the hat. His dark blonde hair flopped as he ran his fingers threw it nervously. I ran the last few metres over to him. We embraced tightly; and he lifted me off my feet.

"Excuse me?" I heard Jenny ask.

"Who are you?" Cynthia finished politely.

"I'm Bobby Franklin." He said extending his hand out to the other two midwives.

"Trixie's brother." Someone cleared their throat behind Bobby and I wheeled round. My blood ran cold, there he was standing - he too in Navy uniform. I cursed silently. Not him, please anybody but him. I wanted to run; I wanted to hide, so I did.

I didn't get more than five paces until a strong grip encircled my arm and pulled me round. I refused to turn my head and look at him.

"What gives you the right?" I whispered, still not looking at him. "To come to my place of work after what…" I paused, "After what you did? Eh Raymond, what right do you have?" I spat.

…

The silence after I spoke seemed to last forever. I don't think I'd ever heard silence quite that loud, like it was trying to pull me down, drowning me. It was broken by the shrill rigging of the telephone, and Jenny walked off to pick it up.

"Do you want some tea?" Cynthia asked hopefully, gesturing in the vague direction of the kitchen.

"I sure wouldn't mind some," My brother, ever the gentleman replied, taking his hat off and following Cynthia. I watched them go, still refusing looking at him.

Silence was all there was left after Booby and Cynthia's departure. Raymond let go of my arm and was standing, looking at the door.

"What do you want?" I asked, quietly, finally turning to face him.

"Your forgiveness. My heart is broken, and I want you to fix it" He stated in his soft Irish accent, also turning to face me. He looked like he hadn't aged a day; he still had the same dark brown hair and piercing blue eyes.

"I gave you forgiveness five years ago." I declared, quietly. "I gave you love and all you did was say goodbye. I am heartbroken, too." I added as an afterthought. We lapsed back it to silence, because both of us knew that whatever we said wouldn't be able to mend the cracks that had started to appear after five years of nothing.

…

I don't know how long we stood there for. Not doing anything, except remembering, that was. The silence was broken by Bobby and Cynthia's laughter emanating from the kitchen. Jenny had passed us by at some point, rushing out to help Mrs Pritchard. The telephone rang and Sister Julienne appeared from the chapel.

"Oh forgive me Nurse Franklin; I wasn't aware we had guests. Young man, I'm sure Nurse will be able to stich that wound above your eye," I swung round at the Nun's words, and looked at Raymond. Sure enough he did have a gash above his eye. I plastered a fake smile on my face and nodded, leading him into the room where we prepared the delivery packs. I gestured to a chair as we entered, and turned to readying a needle and thread.

"You broke me," Raymond whispered.

"We broke each other." I said, my voice wavering slightly.

"We can still fix it." He stated, optimistically, and I saw he was smiling as well.

"We broke each other," I repeated. "Too much to be fixed now." The smile slipped from his face.

"Trixie, please…" I heard the plea in his voice but ignored him, and continued readying the needle.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N I don't know if it's any good, hope you like it. Charliespike18x**

The morning dawned cold and grey. Raymond had left after I had finished stitching his face and Bobby had gone an hour or so later. My thoughts kept drifting back to what Raymond said, had he really meant it? I sat in Nonnatus houses' kitchen mulling over that question and eating a piece of toast when Cynthia entered and took the seat next to me.

"Are you alright?" She asked taking a piece of toast for herself.

"He'd be good for you, Bobby I mean. It's obvious that he likes you." I replied, not answering her question. Cynthia was about to answer when Jenny rushed in.

"Trixie, help. Help, please," She begged. I stood and went over to her.

"What's wrong?" I replied.

"It's Jimmy. Francine has gone it to labour. He wants our help." Jenny said, panic rising in her tone.

"Come on then," I said, following Jenny to the bike rack.

…

When we arrived and Francine and James Wilson's house 20 minutes later I was still thinking about Raymond. Jenny had rapped on the door and Jimmy had shown us up to Francine's room. Her room had bright white walls and a large double bed, the duvet was the colour of the sea. There was a small table next to the bed, it had a crime novel – Taken at the Flood by Agatha Christie- splayed open on Raymond just wouldn't leave me alone, especially when I saw Francine Wilson and realized what her maiden name was. Francine Wilson, nee Spencer, younger sister to Antony Spencer and twin sister to My Raymond. No, not my Raymond, he hadn't been by Raymond in a long time.

Jenny was outside talking to Jimmy when she first spoke to me.

"Beatrice Franklin, what a surprise," She exclaimed "I don't want you here," Francine said quieter. Her voice was just like I remembered it.

"Why?" I said, feigning ignorance, as Francine screamed out in pain as another contraction gripped her.

" Bea…. I think….. you do," She panted, gritting her teeth.

"Don't call me that," I whispered, angry now.

"Why not….." Another contraction hit her. "Is….. that what he….used to call…..you? Bea?" A single tear dripped down my cheek. I wiped the tear away, there was no point crying. It wouldn't get rid of the past; it wouldn't excuse what we did to each other.

"You ripped my family apart," Francine managed to say. "You may as well have killed him Bea, and I haven't seen him for five years. He won't ever forgive Tony…."

"Stop,"

"He should never forgive you… either. Out of everyone you had too chose his brother. You had to choose Tony" She continued regardless of my plea.

Jenny came in and I stood up. "Can't Jimmy come in?" Francine asked. She was scared; I'd know her long enough to realize that.

….

The day I met the Spencer family sits in my mind with clarity that none of my other memories have. I was thirteen years old, and my house at the time had been on the edge of a beach. It was so close that if you walked out of the backdoor, you were on sand. I've always liked the feeling of sand between my toes, and how a beach looks in the dark. It was dark the night I met them.

I had gone out of the backdoor, trying to find Bobby. He had gone out earlier to read on the sand. I could see the shadows of three boys splashing in the waves. I could tell instantly one was my brother, the other two I didn't recognise.

I watched them lark about in the water for a few seconds longer, a smile dancing on my face at their fun. I had just set off across the beach when a girl ran flat into me. We both fell to ground. It was then I heard her laughing. "You Bobby's sister?" She inquired, once we had returned to standing. We were watching the boys again.

"Yes, I'm Bobby's sister."

"He's nice." I nodded, then realised that she couldn't see me in dark.

"Yes. He's nice. Are they your brothers down there with him?"

"Yep. Ray and Tone." She evidently had better vision than I had; as she saw my eyebrows shoot up in confusion. "Raymond and Antony, Tony for short. Hence Ray and Tone."

"Of course."

"We've just moved in next door. The first thing the boys noticed was that the house opens up on the beach." I laughed.

"That was the first thing that Bobby noticed as well."

"How long have you lived here, then?"

"Three years."

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" She asked.

"Yes." It definitely was. "It's even more beautiful at sunset." I informed her. We watched the boys in silence, for a few seconds longer. We watched them tire of the waves and start to walk towards us. That was when I asked her what her name was.

"Francine. Francine Spencer."

And that was the first time I ever met the Spencer's – Francine, Raymond and Tony. I didn't know how my future would be so intertwined with theirs.

…..

It took quite a while but Francine Wilson had just given birth to a beautiful baby boy. Jenny had gone to congratulate Jimmy,

"You know, I still can't believe you did it. You seemed like such a nice girl." She said, using what little energy she had left to shrug. The words stung me, but I didn't let it show.

"I made a mistake,"

"You got what you deserved." She commented. Her words reminded of a poem I had read while at school;

_Everyone makes mistakes,_

_Mine kept me awake,_

_Thinking about what I'd done,_

_I'd lie there for so long,_

_I tried to make it better,_

_I tried to write a letter,_

_But trying never did any good,_

_Even though I thought it should,_

_I could have left it all behind,_

_But you see, I declined,_

_You took my heart,_

_When you went for a new start,_

_And left me with a heart that was about to break,_

_But I guess that's what I get for my mistake,_

….

I felt numb, sitting at the kitchen table in Nonnatus house. I refused to believe what Dr Turner was telling us. It was late, near midnight when he had arrived. He had that look on his face, we used to joke it was 'bad news' face. How right we had been. Jenny was occupying the seat next to me. We were both silent.

"I'm very sorry, but she lost too much blood, there was nothing you could've done. She wasn't meant to be one of our patients, you weren't to now she had Haemophilia." He said, sombrely. I hadn't felt so guilty, since I'd broken Raymond's heart. You see, I knew she had Haemophilia.

**Please review, it really make my day. Charliespike18x **


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